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Chapter 4 – To the Future

McGarrett went to the door in answer to the sound of the bell.

Danny stood on the doorstep. A steady rain was falling outside, and he’d walked from his usual cautious parking space a couple of blocks away without an umbrella. Raindrops sparkled in his wavy reddish-blond hair and the shoulders of his brown suit were darkened with moisture.

“Danny! Where have you been?” Steve asked, stepping back to let his partner in.

“Steve.” Danny stood on the doorstep, looking around the room. “Eric isn’t here?”

“Eric?” McGarrett asked in surprise. “Why on earth would he be here?”

Danny stepped inside, letting Steve close the door, facing his partner where they had so often stood to bid each other goodbye. “Steve,” he began, looking down. “I know Eric is gorgeous, and you two have your past and the Navy in common, and I...I can’t compete with that, but...but please, just tell me.” He looked back up to meet McGarrett’s deep blue eyes. “Don’t leave me dangling like this!” he pleaded.

“Tell you what? What are you talking about?” Steve asked, drawing his eyebrows together in consternation.

“Steve, I’m not blind. Since Eric turned up you haven’t wanted anything to do with me!”

“Danny! You think that’s because I want to be with Eric?” Steve demanded incredulously.

“Well, is it?” Danny asked angrily.

“Danny,” McGarrett said, “Eric is a selfish and unprincipled bastard who left me because he found an admiral who would be more helpful to his career than I could be. How could you possibly think you need to compete with someone like him?” He put a hand on Danny’s shoulder. “And what do you mean he’s gorgeous? Should I be jealous?” He smiled.

“Then why have you been avoiding me?” The younger man shrugged off the hand and turned away, blinking hard, trying to fight back tears. “You didn’t want me around, even at work!”

Steve moved to stand behind his partner, taking him by the shoulders. “Danny, I didn’t entirely trust Eric not to use my secret against me if he felt he had to, to save his own skin. I wasn’t about to put you in his power that way, too, so I didn’t want him to see us together any more than necessary.”

Williams whirled to face him, blue eyes blazing. “Then why didn’t you tell me that? Why just push me away with no explanation?” he shouted at Steve. “Why make me think you didn’t want me anymore?”

“I didn’t realize you would think that!” McGarrett gave way before his partner’s fury, turning to pace over to the lanai doors.

“Did you think you could just put me on a shelf until this case was over? Didn’t you give any consideration to how I might feel?” Danny shouted.

“I guess I didn’t,” Steve said softly, looking into the darkness outside. “I...I was ashamed of my relationship with Eric, and all I could think about was to keep you away from that part of my life. I didn’t want you to know any more about it than I could help.”

“I don’t understand why you wouldn’t trust me!” Danny demanded angrily, following Steve. “How could you think, after all we’ve been through together, that you couldn’t tell me about your past!”

McGarrett turned, on his face a mixture of anger and pain. “What did you want me to tell you, that when I met Eric I fell head over heels in love with him? We were complete opposites, but I was such a lovesick fool that I would have risked anything to be with him,” he said with vicious intensity. “If it weren’t for good friends like Cathy covering for me, I might have been kicked out of the Navy, everything I’d spent my life working for down the drain, but I didn’t care as long as I could be with Eric. Is that what you want to hear?” he continued bitterly.

Danny stood watching him unflinchingly, his expression unreadable.

“Did you want to know that this man I’d have given my life, my career, everything for, slept with someone else behind my back to advance his own career, then when I found out he just laughed, said he couldn’t be with someone so jealous, and dumped me?” Steve’s voice was raw and there was a gleam of unshed tears under his dark lashes. He turned away.

“Steve....” Danny said, reaching out a hand to touch his friend’s arm.

“No! Don’t you dare feel sorry for me! You wanted to hear this!” Steve snapped, rounding on him. “He broke my heart! When I got the offer to leave the Navy and become head of Five-O I jumped at the chance, just to get away from the memories! Having to live like a monk didn’t bother me, because I was determined never to make myself so vulnerable to someone again, and I succeeded until you came along and slipped past my defenses by seeming to be straight until you were so important to me that I couldn’t live without you!” Steve shouted.

After the strain of the past few days and the pain of hearing Steve bare his soul, Danny couldn’t help it. He dissolved into laughter.

“Why is that funny?”

“I’m sorry, Steve, I...I know I shouldn’t laugh,” his partner began, trying to get himself back under control, “but it’s just...just so you to tell me something that romantic by angrily yelling it at me at the top of your lungs.”

For a moment McGarrett looked as though he might explode. Then he took a deep breath and relaxed, trying to suppress a smile. “Shut up!” he growled, reaching to grab Danny by the shoulders and kissing him hard, shoving him against the lanai doors.

Danny kissed him back with equal urgency, pulling off Steve’s tie and tossing it aside and working at his shirt buttons.

Steve pinned his partner against the glass with his body, their already stiffening cocks grinding together.

Danny gasped, his fingers digging into Steve’s back under his shirt as he clung to him.

McGarrett pulled off his lover’s tie, then ripped the sides of his shirt apart, too impatient to wait for buttons. He kissed down Danny’s chest and stomach as he undid his pants and shoved them down, then followed them with his briefs, Danny’s thick cock springing free. Steve engulfed it with his mouth, kneeling in front of his partner.

“Steve!” Danny cried, biting his lip as he tried not to lose control at the sensation as Steve moved on Danny’s cock, stroking him with lips, tongue, and hand, his free hand reaching lower, cupping and caressing.

As Steve did something indescribable with his tongue, Danny moaned, burying his fingers in Steve’s dark hair. It’s been too long, if he keeps this up I can’t last much... “Ah! Steve! Wait, wait, I’m going to...” He tried to raise Steve’s head, but couldn’t wait, and came in Steve’s mouth.

Steve swallowed him, applying gentle suction as Danny filled his mouth with spurts of hot liquid.

Danny shuddered, crying out, lost in waves of pleasure so intense it bordered on pain. When he was finally completely spent he found his legs wouldn’t support him, and he slid down the glass, helped by Steve’s strong arm, to sit on the floor. I’ve never felt anything that amazing, he thought as he came back to earth. But...but what will Steve think?

“Easy, Danny,” Steve said, smiling, his arm around his partner.

“Steve, I’m so sorry. I...I guess I lost control,” Danny said, blushing, looking down at the dark blue carpet.

“Danny, I meant for that to happen,” Steve said. “Didn’t you enjoy it?”

“It was incredible. I’ve never felt anything that good,” he admitted, smiling at his partner. “But when...when it happened to me with a girl once, it wasn’t like that, and she was just mad.”

“It’s an acquired taste,” his lover said with a wink.

“Steve!” Danny blushed.

“Now, if you think you can stand any more, I would like to do something about this,” Steve said, guiding Danny’s hand to his painfully erect cock, and leaning forward to kiss him.

His mouth tastes like...like my semen, I suppose. It’s...not a bad taste, really, might take some getting used to.... Danny thought. He reached to unfasten Steve’s pants and slip a hand inside to grasp him, eliciting a groan.

“Mm, Danny....”

The doorbell rang.

McGarrett was instantly alert. He quickly assessed the state they were in. Danny was incongruously wearing his jacket over his open shirt with missing buttons. His pants and briefs were around his ankles, Steve’s shirt and pants were undone, and his hair was a mess from Danny’s fingers.

“Who’s there?” McGarrett demanded, helping Danny to his feet, then quickly fastening his own clothing.

“Steve, it’s Eric,” came a voice from the other side of the door.

Steve briefly covered his eyes with one hand. Why me? he thought.

When he looked up he saw that Danny was once again wearing pants. He retrieved Danny’s tie and deftly knotted it around his neck in an attempt to hide the missing shirt buttons while Danny tried to tidy Steve’s hair with his fingers.

“It will have to do,” Steve said. “Shall we face my past together?” he asked Danny softly, one eyebrow raised.

Danny nodded.

Steve crossed to the door and opened it. “Eric.”

“Steve!” Eric said exuberantly, standing on the doorstep in the gray pinstripe suit. “Here, I brought a bottle of champagne,” he said, handing it to McGarrett. “I thought we could toast old times and celebrate my release from durance vile.”

“I’m sorry, Eric, but I’m afraid I already have company,” Steve told him, taking a step back and gesturing towards his partner. “You’ve met Dan Williams, of course.”

“Of course,” Eric said, looking amused. “I’m sorry if I interrupted anything.” He looked pointedly around the room, taking in the still-visible bulge in Steve’s pants, the ruffled state of his hair, Danny’s damaged shirt, and the fact that Steve’s tie was draped over the lamp where it had landed as a result of Danny’s toss.

Oops, missed the tie, Steve thought, closing the door and setting the bottle down on the coffee table.

“So, Danny Williams,” Eric said, sauntering over to look him up and down, unfazed by his expression. “I thought so, despite your protestations to the contrary. The faithful second-in-command. With emphasis on the ‘faithful’ this time, I suppose,” he said, turning to look at his ex-lover.

“You never did understand the value of loyalty, Eric,” McGarrett told him.

“I’m afraid you’re right. One of my many character failings, and the reason you and I could never live happily ever after, my dear Steve. But tell me,” he said, crossing to where Steve stood and resting a hand on his arm, “in the face of all this stalwart reliability,” he cast a glance at Danny, “Don’t you ever miss dating a, shall we say, free spirit?”

“No,” McGarrett said flatly, removing Eric’s hand.

“You can’t deny it was exciting.” Eric slid an arm around Steve’s waist and leaned over his shoulder to say into his ear, “What about the sex? You can’t tell me you don’t miss the sex.”

“No, I don’t miss the sex.” Steve extricated himself and moved to join Danny, who was standing in front of the coffee table with his arms crossed, glaring at Eric.

“We took crazy risks, but you know Steve, when he wants something, he wants it right away,” Eric said to Danny, coming to stand on his other side and leaning close. “Supply closets, empty conference rooms....”

“Eric,” Steve said warningly.

“...the best time was on the lanai of our hotel room overlooking a parade. I was leaning over the railing, with Steve taking me from behind, while the girls on the floats waved to us....”

“Eric! That’s enough!” Steve snapped, stepping around Danny to interpose himself between Eric and his partner.

Danny felt himself blushing at the mental image.

“Sorry, Steve, too much for his innocent ears?” Eric smiled, taking a step back from the irate head of Five-O, and turning away. I didn’t figure you for a cradle-robber, but I guess you always did have to be in control.”

“You know, you have a lot of nerve!” Danny said angrily. “You really hurt Steve back then, but you turn up and ask for his help anyway, he gives it to you, and now you come here to cause trouble?”

“I’m sorry,” Eric said, turning to sweep them a half-bow. “I actually came here to thank Steve properly, but I’m afraid your presence put an end to that. Unless you’d care for a threesome?” He smiled suggestively. “Eric,” Steve ground out, taking a step towards him. “It’s been lovely seeing you again, but....”

“But, get out. OK, Steve,” the blonde man said. He addressed Danny, his tone serious now. “Please, be good to Steve. God knows, I wasn’t always...but he’s special.”

“He is to me,” Danny said, glaring at Eric.

“I’ll leave you the champagne as a peace offering,” Eric said, opening the door. “Goodbye, Steve.” The door closed.

Steve sat down on the sofa and put a hand over his eyes. “I’m sorry about that, Danny.”

“Steve, like I told you, I don’t care if you have a past. Even if it’s Eric. All I care about is that you trust me enough not to leave me in the dark!”

“Danny....” Steve said, with a fond smile.

Danny came to join McGarrett on the sofa. “Hey, you got it a new pot!” he said, noticing the African violet he had bought Steve on the end table, now ensconced in a brown-glazed ceramic container. He looked at the library book on the table next to it. “The Care and Feeding of African Violets, huh?”

“I wouldn’t want to kill plants,” Steve said, sheepishly.

Danny held up the champagne bottle, reading the label. “This is pretty expensive stuff.”

“Eric always did appreciate the finer things,” his partner commented dryly.

“Too bad you don’t drink.”

“Go ahead and open it,” Steve said. “I’ll have a drink with you, Danno.” He stood and fetched two saucer-shaped glasses from the kitchen.

Danny was struggling with the cork. “I’m sorry, I’m generally a beer drinker,” he muttered. Finally, it popped out with a sharp report, showering Danny’s pants with a fountain of liquid. He sighed, attempting to dry his lap with his handkerchief. “This is not a good night for my clothing.”

Steve poured champagne into glasses, handed one to Danny, and sat next to him on the sofa. “To the future,” he said, clinking his glass against Danny’s and taking a sip, then setting the glass on the table and leaning back.

A gust of wind blew in through the open lanai door, billowing the curtains and ruffling Steve’s hair.

When Steve turned to look at Danny, he flushed and looked down at his glass.

McGarrett raised an eyebrow. “Penny for your thoughts?”

“I was just thinking how handsome you look with the wind in your hair,” his partner admitted.

“You’ll make me blush.”

“I’m afraid you should be with someone who looks like Eric, not someone ordinary like me.” Danny was still studying his glass intently.

“Did you just describe yourself as looking ordinary?” Steve asked, smiling at him. “Danny, I find it impossible to believe that you have managed to reach this point in life without ever looking in a mirror or seeing the effect you have on people.”

“You’re biased, Steve,” Danny smiled briefly.

“Have you ever had trouble getting women to go out with you?” his partner demanded.

“Well, no, but....”

“Why do you think I send you undercover so often? One look from those innocent blue eyes would melt anyone, your smile lights up a whole room, and your mouth just cries out to be kissed.” Steve put his arm around Danny’s shoulders and leaned over to do so.

“Do you have any idea how often I imagined doing that after you came to work for Five-O? I wondered if I had made a mistake in hiring you, because it was too distracting having you in front of me every day. I fantasized about undressing you, sweeping everything off my desk, and making love to you right there. Or on the office floor, the couch, the bookcase...I don’t think there’s a piece of furniture in my office that I haven’t pictured you on naked.”

“Steve, I never had any idea....”

“I tried never to think of it while you were there, since I was afraid you would guess. But at night, when I was working alone...well, sometimes I was glad I have a private washroom.”

“I can’t believe that all the time I was...I was thinking about you, you were doing the same,” Danny said, looking embarrassed.

“Did it bother you, being attracted to a man?” Steve asked, curious.

“At first I didn’t think about it. I mean, I...I admired you, and if you think your hero is good looking, that doesn’t seem strange, does it? And, well, you just are, objectively speaking. But then I started to notice little things...I’d be sitting in the car next to you and catch myself looking at how your hair falls over your forehead, or the strength of your hands on the steering wheel, or the little squint lines at the corner of your eye, and thinking how I’d like to kiss you there....”

“Here I thought you were thinking about the case when we were in the car,” McGarrett said, smiling.

“Not always,” Danny admitted sheepishly. “What really bothered me, though, was the first time I dreamed about you.”

“What was I doing?” Steve asked, eyebrow raised.

“You had called me into the office on a Sunday afternoon, and there was no one else there, and...and, well...we...we started...well...making out...and...undressing, and touching each other...and then I woke up with the sheets all sticky. I...I was completely shocked. I wondered what the heck was wrong with me. You have no idea how hard it was to face you at work the next day. But then I started thinking, and I realized that I had been looking at you...differently...for a while. And then Trinian shot you, and I...well, I knew then that you were important to me in a way that no woman ever had been. I...when poor Jane was killed...it was awful, but it didn’t feel like my whole world had ended. When you were shot....” Danny took refuge in drinking his champagne.

“I felt the same way when Auston shot you,” Steve admitted.

“It sure hurt a lot, but on the whole, getting shot was the best thing that ever happened to me,” Danny said, looking up at Steve and smiling.

“Danny! I’m sorry it took that to make me stop torturing both of us. Now,” he said, leaning over and kissing Danny again, “shall we take up again where we left off when we were so rudely interrupted?”

“Wait...Steve, what Eric said about sex....”

I’m going to hunt Eric down and strangle him, Steve thought. “Ignore what Eric said about sex,” he said. “We were young and stupid, and he was just trying to get a rise out of me.”

“But, well, you know the pictures we had to look through, from the pornographer’s place? I...I never really thought about the...the things that two guys....”

“Kono told me you were upset. I saw the pictures you were looking at. Danny, we never have to do anything like that if you don’t want to.”

“What...what if I do want to? I didn’t run out of the room because I was upset,” Danny said quietly.

“What? Oh....” Steve said. “So, you want to try...what they were doing in the pictures?”

“Yes,” Danny said, looking down, his voice almost inaudible. “Does...does it hurt?”

“It can, but if we’re careful, and take it slowly, it can be extremely pleasurable. For both parties.”

“Steve...I want to feel you...inside me....”

Steve clenched his hands. Take it easy. You have to go slow, be gentle, or you’re going to hurt him. But, God, when he says things like that.... Steve took the glass from Danny’s hands and set it on the table, then took him by the hand. “Come on, let’s go to bed.”

In the bedroom Steve pulled Danny to him and kissed him. He slipped Danny’s jacket off, then removed his tie and undid his remaining shirt buttons, as Danny likewise undressed Steve. When they stood naked together, their hard cocks rubbing against each other as they kissed, Steve led Danny to the bed and sat him on the edge.

For the second time that evening, Steve took Danny’s cock into his mouth. “Mm...you taste like champagne....” he commented.

This time Steve stopped as he felt Danny building towards a climax, climbing into bed with him.

“What...what should I do?” Danny asked.

“Lie on your back for now, and bend your knees. I’m going to use my fingers first,” Steve said, kissing him as he reached across for the lubricant in the nightstand drawer. He returned his mouth to Danny’s cock, fondling his balls with one hand. He slid one lubricated finger of the other hand back to probe gently at Danny’s tightly puckered asshole. He slid his fingertip inside, eliciting a noise from Danny.

“Just relax your muscles,” Steve told him, increasing the tempo of his mouth. He gently pushed, working his finger deeper until it was buried to the knuckle. Then he began to stroke it in and out.

Danny gasped.

“Are you OK?” Steve asked. “Do you want me to stop?”

“No...don’t...don’t stop, Steve...ah!...that feels good....”

Steve raised his head. “Ready, Danny?”

Danny nodded.

“OK, this will probably work best if you lie on your side.”

Danny complied, and Steve moved to lie behind him. With one hand he stroked Danny, while with the other he positioned his well- lubricated cock against Danny’s ass. “Stop me if it hurts,” he said into Danny’s ear.

Steve pushed gently.

“Ow...Steve, wait....”

“Easy, Danny. Just relax.” Steve stopped until he felt Danny’s muscles relax a bit, then tried again, until he had worked the head of his penis inside. “Doing OK?” he asked.

“Ye...yes,” Danny said through clenched teeth.

Steve continued gently working himself into Danny’s ass. God, he’s tight. Slowly, Steve, slowly....

Finally, Steve’s length was entirely inside. He waited a minute for Danny to get used to the feeling, stroking his cock and teasing his earlobe with teeth and tongue. Then Steve started to move.

“Ow, ow, ow...wait....” Danny reached back to grab Steve’s hip.

Steve stopped, continuing his ministrations to Danny’s erect shaft.

“OK,” Danny said, moving his hips a bit.

Steve groaned. I should have come before trying this. It’s been too long and he’s too tight, and I don’t know how long I can keep my control. He started gently sliding out and then back in, just a bit at first, then farther, in a building rhythm. God, that feels good....

Steve moved faster.

Danny made a sound. His hands were clenched in the bedcovers, and his shoulders were tensed.

Damn it, I know I’m hurting him. I have to slow down. Steve bit down on his lip hard and slowed his motions. “Do...do you want me to stop?”

“No...don’t stop...I’m...I’m OK....” Danny managed, breathing hard.

Steve continued to stroke in and out, moving faster, in unison with his hand. Just a bit more.... “Ah!” He thrust harder.

Danny groaned and came, covering Steve’s hand with sticky warmth.

The feeling of Danny’s muscles contracting around Steve’s cock sent him over the edge, and he buried himself to the hilt in Danny’s ass as he delivered his load. He collapsed, gasping, holding Danny close.

Steve gradually came back to himself. Oh, God, what did I do? He slid out of Danny as gently as possible. He felt a bit sore from the friction, and knew Danny must hurt worse. “Danny, are you OK?”

Danny rolled over to face Steve, wincing slightly. “I’m OK.” He managed a half smile.

I blew it, thought Steve. He trusted me, and I lost control and hurt him. “I’m so sorry.”

“Steve,” Danny said, raising a hand to caress Steve’s face. “It’s OK. I’m sure it will get easier with practice.”

“You mean...you don’t mind trying again?”

“It hurt, but I also...well...I enjoyed it.”

“Danny....” Steve kissed him tenderly on the mouth.

“Steve, you’re bleeding,” Danny said, concerned.

Steve touched his bitten lip. “It’s nothing.”

He pulled Danny close. “Any time you want to practice, just let me know,” he said softly.

“Mm. I look forward to that,” Danny said, resting his head on Steve’s shoulder.

“To the future,” Steve said.

“To the future.”

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